I Hate Seattle

I have owned a small business here in the higher end part of the U district for about 16 years. It used to be fun. The people used to be nice....well, the young guys still are sort of nice..it's the middle aged hags out there that are out of their minds with self love. I have a job that's fun.....nothing too extreme...but, in the end, product has to be perfect. The female customers that I've had for the last 16 years are still great..it's the new breed of women that are killing my spirit. I am high energy, wear bright clothing and talk to everyone about everything. Alot of people have told me that I don't belong in Seattle....I am more of a Southern girl...kind(mostly), gentle(mostly)..outgoing. I tried like heck to make it work ..I did....but lately, I've just been beaten up one too many times by smart a** ugly women that think their time is more valuable than mine. If I get one more hand in the face in the middle of one of my sentences..I'll scream..(they have to answer their phones, you know). Or..."I can't wait for you to do your job...I have kids in the car."..hurry hurry hurry.What the heck is the rush? I'm tired fo the fake friendliness that seems to be the norm here in Seattle. I'm tired of the RAIN..the gloom..the lack of friendships.. the jealousy..the miserable way women dress...(sloppy fleece..Oh Yeah!!! and they wonder why they're single?) I'm tired of the road rage...I'm tired of the rage against me as a Christian...(my fish symbol really gets people angry)..WHY??? I'm tired of the insulting way people talk to each other here...snippy snippy snippy. I'm tired of everone here thinking this hell hole is the BEST place on God's green earth to live..."Why on earth would you want to move?) Her's a tip Seattle..When it comes to driving....The lane on the far left..isn't a lane to mosey on down the highway in..it's a PASSING lane. Pass and then move over. (move over?) Ever been to England?? Get a clue people!! Don't honk your horn at me when I'm at a cross walk..letting someone actually cross. I've been road raged by a smart car..a smart car..raging against my pickup truck? I've also been raged against by a cyclist...he thumped his wheels into the back of my BMW sports car....that worked!! I'm tired of the "I'm better than you" attitude that all the young/middle aged women have here. I was single again at the age of 40...I had NO problem getting dates. Guys thought my personality was fun and festive. But all I hear is these women complain that they can't get a date...Well..there is some truth to that I guess. Some of the guys here in Seattle could use some good old fashioned mid west influence!! Go eat a steak, buy a gun, lift some weights, get a tan, get outside and get away from your iphones and computers. Stop asking young girls to "hang out"..Call them up..go on a date...grow some ba**s...be a man!!!! Open up a door for a lady...and you young gals...try being ladies. Have some self restraint...don't give it all away the first week. The conversations I hear are amazing! Financially..Seattle is DOOMED!!!!! The taxes keep getting higher, the debt keeps growing, nothing is going to be done with that death trap called the viaduct. The 520 bridge is soon to be tolled..that's going to be GREAT!!! The roads are in disrepair..try going aroun Lk. Washignton Blvd...right past the Arboretum....POT HOLE CITY. Good Grief. Ms. Gregoire will do her best to make WA ST look just like California...financially. We Are Broke..Seattle!!!! I like Starbucks, though. But don't go for the coffee!! It tastes burnt. I like chai tea lemonade..and the coffee cake. If everyone treated each other like the workers do at Starbucks..we'd be a much friendlier place. Instead of What Would Jesus Do? ..could Seattlites possibly embrace the notion of What Would Barristas Do? I'm going back East.....Hopefully I can find a farmhouse tucked in a cornfield somehwere...me, my husband, my dog, my bible and my gun.....Did that make you angry??? If I was a Starbucks, would you want to throw a rock through my window? Like the liberal "no gun" protester that smashed Starbuck window in Leschi? (And dowsed the front with red paint??) That is the real problem the IS Seattle. It's Filled to the brim with Liberals that stand for free speech, human rights, anti-violence...until they need to make a statement against violence -with violence. Passive aggressive, violent, rushed, angry, unfufilled, arrogant,holier than though, faith hating, mean spirited people..(not everyone). I need to be quiet now. My unders have gotten into a bunch, and now I need to go cool off.

I've heard Seattle's peculiar driving etiquette discussed a lot, but I've noticed something interesting and maybe you have, too.

When the driver at the intersection stops and insists that you go first, and you don't play the "you first" game back with them and instead proceed, have you noticed that some of these people will then gun it out into the intersection because you didn't play the wave game with them?

Weird. If they didn't want me to go first, then why all of the formalities?

Has anyone had experience with the Trip Planner on Seattle Metro's website.....I mean, a "positive" experience? I've tried several times to use it and each time, it keeps telling me that either the addresses I'm entering are incorrect or simply that "Trip not possible."

So funny that I just found this site. I am looking for a good "I hate Seattle" bumper sticker before I leave in 2 months. After living here less than a year, I am preparing to take the kids and hit the road, leaving my beloved husband to suffer here in Dante's Third Ring of Hell.

Luckily, we had the foresight to NOT sell our big house on 5 acres for the $230,000 it is valued at. Where the sun shines most all the time.

I seem to have a different complaint about merging as the rest of you. I do stay off the highways here--which means I can't even drive into Seattle proper if I wanted to! Merging is an agreement between friendly people where the driver on the highway slows a bit to LET THE MERGER IN! Come on! Everyone around here drives like they can't even see the incoming cars!

I don't really blame Seattlers for being such pricks, however, since they are all probably vitamin D deficient. People don't wave at each other and everyone frowns. The weather is horrific. The speed-limits are insanely slow.

So, does anyone know a good website or "I hate Seattle" logo to put on a bumper sticker.

"A joining together of two flows; Combine or be combined into a whole; Blend gradually into something else"

If you haven't noticed, freeway traffic (usually) goes about 60 mph and if you're going that speed when merging, you will be less likely to fuck up the flow and perhaps be the target of perfectly constituted road rage. To avoid this, simply follow the step-by-step instructions below or stop fucking using the god damn freeway!! If you're too fucking scared to go 60 and merge at the same time, STOP DRIVING AND GO KILL YOURSELF SO WE DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH YOUR SHIT!

The Art of Entering Gaps:

Merging is designed to permit vehicles to enter and exit a highway without causing disruption in the flow of traffic. Highways are equipped with on-ramps and off-ramps, which generally connect to acceleration and deceleration lanes.

The idea behind this is when you pull onto the entrance ramp, you slowly begin building velocity. At the point where you can make eye contact with the highway, you need to immediately start assessing the gaps and the speed of existing traffic. From here, you should turn on your signal to reflect your intent to other drivers to merge onto the roadway.

Then use the acceleration lane to match the speed flow, and ease your vehicle into an appropriate gap before the acceleration lane ends. Some highways give you slabs of asphalt that are long enough for a jet to take off; others, especially on the East Coast, are so short you will need to make quick decisions or yield.

A successful merge entails you entering the highway almost at or at the speed limit, while causing no disturbance in the speeds of the vehicles behind you.

Thank you and good night.

-MUR